There are stages in your life when all you do feels mundane and monotonous and still you find really small pockets of time out of the monotony and name them weekends…
Over these weekends you are allowed to and supposed to have all the fun that you have missed out in the past 5 days.
A few days ago, over one of these days of joy… I got some time just to myself; since this seclusion has become a very dear experience I decided that I wanted to invest this time to sit, meditate, ponder and think about a lot of things that have happened in my life in all these past years…
I realized that we rarely get a chance to tell our family, our friends, our loved ones, and all the ones in between… how happy we have been with them and how much they have contributed to make our life a learning experience; sometimes the happy way and the other times with a pinch of salt.
So this day relishing the few spare moments that I had to myself I just wanted to mentally, emotionally, intellectually and spiritually thank all the people who had touched my life in one way or the other…
I sat and in my mind called out all those names that I remembered… some known, some ghosts of the past and some who had now become strangers… and then I thanked each and every one of those individuals.
Just a note to say… P.S. I Love You!
Incase if I haven’t mentioned this to you on your face or over the phone or in any other way.
If you have landed here, you landed here to be thanked for being what you are!
Friday, November 27, 2009
Thursday, October 22, 2009
3 Years and counting...
Today apparently marks the 3rrd anniversary of the day when I first met my wifey… A lot of people find it very hard to digest that ours is an ‘arranged marriage’ this means that our parents ‘arranged’ for us to meet before we hit it off…
I wouldn’t forget that day… I was still recovering from my devastatingly bad breakup from an ex-flame. I had decided to go to my parents’ home and recuperate from the emotional, mental, intellectual, spiritual and every other ‘al’ drain…
The first 2 days I was there, I spent my time lazing in front of the idiot box and catching up on all my reading… I reread my collection of Richard Bach books for a super boost since they usually help me out when I am feeling low.
On the third day, sometime in the afternoon post lunch when I was sprawled in my bedroom sleeping with a book; my mum unceremoniously announced that someone has come to visit me. Well since I was at home and I didn’t expect any visitors I was dressed in my usual ‘ghar ka attire’ ganji and chaddis I step out in the living room and find a pretty looking girl sitting on the couch with a bunch of flowers, I jog my brain trying to place her in my memory… was she an ex classmate? A friend from my old college? Someone who I worked with? But all the slots came blank… she was a beautiful stranger.
She introduced herself and I went through an immediate whirlwind of emotions… first anger (why did my mum try to set me up with someone when she knows that I came home to recover from a breakup?) then blushing (first time she came to meet me and I am dressed in tanks and shorts?) and then elation (yaar ladki to badi sundar hai)
We sat and talked random things for a while and then she left… leaving me wanting for more…
The next morning she called, she wanted to meet me again! We decided to catch-up over coffee… I had a haunt whenever I was in Ahmedabad and that was a café called Mocha, I invited her to meet me there.
We met sometime in the morning, around 10ish ordered coffees and started talking… after a while I ordered a hookah (this was more of a test to check if she agrees to me smoking or not) and to my utter surprise, shock and elation she didn’t mind but actually joined in! Wow, I do like this girl...
And then I felt as if I was talking to a long lost friend… in fact we had a lot of friends in common! Couple of her school friends were my girlfriends in college and some of my school friends were her friends in college. We talked and talked and talked some more…
By the time we realized that we have had buckets full of coffee, stomachs full of chow and lungs full of the hookah smoke it was already past 6 in the evening! We had spent over 7 hours on our first date! And there still was a feeling that there was a lot of catching up to do…
We met everyday for the next 4 days and on the fifth day we decided that we are ready to spend the rest of our lives with each other. So on the 6th day we got engaged and early morning on the 8th day; I left back for Bangalore…
In four months we were married and since then, every day I wakeup smiling and thanking my stars that I decided to go for a 7 hour long coffee that morning…
I wouldn’t forget that day… I was still recovering from my devastatingly bad breakup from an ex-flame. I had decided to go to my parents’ home and recuperate from the emotional, mental, intellectual, spiritual and every other ‘al’ drain…
The first 2 days I was there, I spent my time lazing in front of the idiot box and catching up on all my reading… I reread my collection of Richard Bach books for a super boost since they usually help me out when I am feeling low.
On the third day, sometime in the afternoon post lunch when I was sprawled in my bedroom sleeping with a book; my mum unceremoniously announced that someone has come to visit me. Well since I was at home and I didn’t expect any visitors I was dressed in my usual ‘ghar ka attire’ ganji and chaddis I step out in the living room and find a pretty looking girl sitting on the couch with a bunch of flowers, I jog my brain trying to place her in my memory… was she an ex classmate? A friend from my old college? Someone who I worked with? But all the slots came blank… she was a beautiful stranger.
She introduced herself and I went through an immediate whirlwind of emotions… first anger (why did my mum try to set me up with someone when she knows that I came home to recover from a breakup?) then blushing (first time she came to meet me and I am dressed in tanks and shorts?) and then elation (yaar ladki to badi sundar hai)
We sat and talked random things for a while and then she left… leaving me wanting for more…
The next morning she called, she wanted to meet me again! We decided to catch-up over coffee… I had a haunt whenever I was in Ahmedabad and that was a café called Mocha, I invited her to meet me there.
We met sometime in the morning, around 10ish ordered coffees and started talking… after a while I ordered a hookah (this was more of a test to check if she agrees to me smoking or not) and to my utter surprise, shock and elation she didn’t mind but actually joined in! Wow, I do like this girl...
And then I felt as if I was talking to a long lost friend… in fact we had a lot of friends in common! Couple of her school friends were my girlfriends in college and some of my school friends were her friends in college. We talked and talked and talked some more…
By the time we realized that we have had buckets full of coffee, stomachs full of chow and lungs full of the hookah smoke it was already past 6 in the evening! We had spent over 7 hours on our first date! And there still was a feeling that there was a lot of catching up to do…
We met everyday for the next 4 days and on the fifth day we decided that we are ready to spend the rest of our lives with each other. So on the 6th day we got engaged and early morning on the 8th day; I left back for Bangalore…
In four months we were married and since then, every day I wakeup smiling and thanking my stars that I decided to go for a 7 hour long coffee that morning…
Monday, August 03, 2009
Generation GAP...
Over the weekend I met a group of young women who all were in the range of 18-21. We were having a strangely ‘mature’ discussion about life, experiences, and things in general.
They all were overly intelligent and ‘grown up’ and a lot more matured than what I used to be when I was doing my graduation.
One thing that hit me real hard is that in just 10 years the threshold of being ‘grown up’ has narrowed so much! I still remember when I was 21 quite a few years ago, I sported the perfect devil may care attitude; the only priorities in life for me were pumping iron, hanging out with my friends and have as much FUN as I could… this didn’t consist smoking up, drinking or getting laid
I thought that I had seen a lot in life when I was 20 but now I sit here wondering how much more do I still see to say that I have seen it all…
These girls were so ‘matured’… they had the experience of rolling joints and smoking them up, they had downed buckets full of spirits, had lost their virginity a really long time ago and yet, all of them were just kids!
Do I think of this as the beginning of the end? The kids are not kids anymore… they all are desperate to grow up… Most of them have already started looking overly matured for their age and they also behave as if they have seen it all… the little girls want to be women and the boys well, they will still remain boys but they all seem to be in an awful hurry to get laid as soon as they realize that they are able to hold on to a hard-on…
I really hope and pray that some of the youngsters read this post and they all try to retain and relish their innocence, childishness, youth, and the optimism that only they can hold… please hold on just a little bit longer guys, you still have a long way to grow old and trust me, when it finally hits that you are OLD, you will miss all the innocence that you left behind a long time ago…
GOD BLESS!
They all were overly intelligent and ‘grown up’ and a lot more matured than what I used to be when I was doing my graduation.
One thing that hit me real hard is that in just 10 years the threshold of being ‘grown up’ has narrowed so much! I still remember when I was 21 quite a few years ago, I sported the perfect devil may care attitude; the only priorities in life for me were pumping iron, hanging out with my friends and have as much FUN as I could… this didn’t consist smoking up, drinking or getting laid
I thought that I had seen a lot in life when I was 20 but now I sit here wondering how much more do I still see to say that I have seen it all…
These girls were so ‘matured’… they had the experience of rolling joints and smoking them up, they had downed buckets full of spirits, had lost their virginity a really long time ago and yet, all of them were just kids!
Do I think of this as the beginning of the end? The kids are not kids anymore… they all are desperate to grow up… Most of them have already started looking overly matured for their age and they also behave as if they have seen it all… the little girls want to be women and the boys well, they will still remain boys but they all seem to be in an awful hurry to get laid as soon as they realize that they are able to hold on to a hard-on…
I really hope and pray that some of the youngsters read this post and they all try to retain and relish their innocence, childishness, youth, and the optimism that only they can hold… please hold on just a little bit longer guys, you still have a long way to grow old and trust me, when it finally hits that you are OLD, you will miss all the innocence that you left behind a long time ago…
GOD BLESS!
Friday, July 31, 2009
Doing it in the rains
She looked so fine standing there in the sunshine… smiling at me… taunting me… asking me if I’m game… I looked at her shyly at first, brewed some confidence deep within… walked over to her and touched that glistening, silken smooth surface…
She asked again, so are you gonna do it or not? Aren’t you man enough? All men do it at least once in the rain… getting wet, riding hard…
I finally mustered the courage and mounted her… put the little magic piece into her and pressed all the right buttons… and she roared... SHE’S ALIVE! SHE’S ALIVE!!!
There was the RedEye growling and purring at the same time…
Ready to take on the wet roads once again… my partner in most of my crimes…
She asked again, so are you gonna do it or not? Aren’t you man enough? All men do it at least once in the rain… getting wet, riding hard…
I finally mustered the courage and mounted her… put the little magic piece into her and pressed all the right buttons… and she roared... SHE’S ALIVE! SHE’S ALIVE!!!
There was the RedEye growling and purring at the same time…
Ready to take on the wet roads once again… my partner in most of my crimes…
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Thought...
It was a long arduous walk through the maze in the forest, a few beams of sun filtered through the gaps in the canopy of the foliage…
I looked up at the tall blades of grass, through them, beyond them… looked at the blue wonder. Where life seemed to be…
Now, I trod the long forgotten grasslands… with my head in the clouds… looking down, wondering, how wonderful it would be to get lost again in that foliage…
Does everyone go through this???
I looked up at the tall blades of grass, through them, beyond them… looked at the blue wonder. Where life seemed to be…
Now, I trod the long forgotten grasslands… with my head in the clouds… looking down, wondering, how wonderful it would be to get lost again in that foliage…
Does everyone go through this???
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
ain't no sunshine when she is gone
Ain't no sunshine when she's gone.
It's not warm when she's away.
Ain't no sunshine when she's gone
and she's always gone too long
anytime she goes away.
once again the annual ‘distancing of selves’ happened yesterday when I saw off my sweet wifey… she went away to her parents’ for a month and it actually hurt seeing her go! Maybe coz I had just returned from my two month long ‘stint’ in the UK.
A lot of smart and experienced people have told me, the distancing of selves in a close relationship is very important for both the people involved to better understand and appreciate each other along with knowing your own self.
Hmm, so what more do I need to know about me that I didn’t catch in the past almost 30years? Did I accidentally or intentionally stop talking to myself? Did I cease diving inside my head and getting lost into my thoughts? Humph, maybe…
Thankfully, this time around the not so new job in the new company and the transition of the processes is taking up so much of my conscious time that I hardly notice or acknowledge the passing hours, days and now weeks… since everyone who still has a job cribs and complains about the dwindling market conditions and the uncertainty of the job market globally, I’ve decided that I am not going to join the crib gang or take any stupid hasty decision like quitting my last job on a day’s notice…
This time I will hopefully take it easy, try and manage two different teams… though I am getting methodically drawn and quartered in a very gradual process at the office by my bumbling team of newbies and some really rusted oldies :-) I like it in here since it is still new…
Thanks that the wifey has decided to go away for a month so that I can invest this time in the office and update blogs like these at an ungodly hour of midnight (especially when my day started at 10 in the morning) I do miss her…
I think about her almost all the time… just when I wakeup, thinking that she looks pretty when we wakeup together and smile at each other thanking god for one more day of togetherness and love…
While having my breakfast I wonder if she would’ve had eaten or not?!! Wondering if she will be taking her vitamins…
During the tough times at work when I realize that she will not be waiting for me when I go back home all tired and battered in the evening…
During the long and mindlessly dragging meetings I happily slide in my day dreams about us…
Dreaming about her in my sleep and then the whole cycle starts again the next morning as soon as I wake up :-)
This year I will not complain, crib, or stay cross at my wifey going away… instead, I am going to cherish, relish and treasure this amazingly special relationship that I have with one of the most wonderful souls on this planet.
Saturday, April 18, 2009
wishful thinking?!!
From 14 hour workdays to 12 hour and then again to the same 14hour day grind! Sometimes a tired mind would venture to wander a bit and wonder, “is this all really worth it”?
Titles change, people change, surroundings change and even the goddamned ‘work culture’ changes! But you realize that the grind is still as tiring as always and the politics are as murky as every…
Someone asked me a few weekends ago… LJ what would be your dream job? Honestly I was caught unprepared and I started fumbling with my answer; I started by saying how I always loved writing poetry and prose, then moved on my love towards music and thinking about ‘RJ’ing or ‘VJ’ing… for a while I also talked about becoming an international travel show host! (Anybody out there listening???) then settled to one of my personal favorite dreams… my own Restaurant!
But honestly, I don’t know what I enjoy doing for a living now! Been doing the same work and hitting the same grind since so many years now that this industry looks like a pool of quicksand and I would give anything to step away from it and do something where I could use my brain’s creative sides a little bit… off late I have actually started feeling extinct when I look and talk to some of the ‘youngsters’ who manage to wiggle some spare time out of their schedules and still pursue a hobby or do something interesting!
Even the books now look at me from the bookshelf like long forgotten friends who try to strike up a chord of knowingness but I just can’t recollect where I met them last.
I was told once when I was very young and then had the same thing reiterated and burnt in my brain for so many times by personal experiences and hearing others’ stories…
NEVER LOSE FAITH!
If you are a good person, good things will happen to you… if not now, maybe when you are ready for them… wait is the best thing that will work…
Hoping for the best!
INSHALLAH
Titles change, people change, surroundings change and even the goddamned ‘work culture’ changes! But you realize that the grind is still as tiring as always and the politics are as murky as every…
Someone asked me a few weekends ago… LJ what would be your dream job? Honestly I was caught unprepared and I started fumbling with my answer; I started by saying how I always loved writing poetry and prose, then moved on my love towards music and thinking about ‘RJ’ing or ‘VJ’ing… for a while I also talked about becoming an international travel show host! (Anybody out there listening???) then settled to one of my personal favorite dreams… my own Restaurant!
But honestly, I don’t know what I enjoy doing for a living now! Been doing the same work and hitting the same grind since so many years now that this industry looks like a pool of quicksand and I would give anything to step away from it and do something where I could use my brain’s creative sides a little bit… off late I have actually started feeling extinct when I look and talk to some of the ‘youngsters’ who manage to wiggle some spare time out of their schedules and still pursue a hobby or do something interesting!
Even the books now look at me from the bookshelf like long forgotten friends who try to strike up a chord of knowingness but I just can’t recollect where I met them last.
I was told once when I was very young and then had the same thing reiterated and burnt in my brain for so many times by personal experiences and hearing others’ stories…
NEVER LOSE FAITH!
If you are a good person, good things will happen to you… if not now, maybe when you are ready for them… wait is the best thing that will work…
Hoping for the best!
INSHALLAH
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